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Be there when your child needs you
Jan 28th
Once you have confirmed that your child is a troubled teen, what is the next step you should take? It is important to accept the fact that you might not be able to help your child without professional help.
Try considering the following measures:
1. Consult your teenager’s doctor –The first measure is to get a physical check up done in order to detect if there are any physical problems connected to health. Get an appointment with the doctor immediately, without delay. Hormonal changes in the body may be the main reason for all problems. Thus consulting the doctor is utmost important.
2. Consult the guidance counselor at school – Though she might not be in a position to provide the child a one-on-one counseling service, she can be of great help by telling you about the attitude and the troubling behavior of the child that the teachers and the other staff members might have taken note of. This can be of great help in finding out the child’s moods and behavior when away from home.
3. Consult a professional counselor and look for proper counseling-If you don’t know whom to approach and whom to contact, consult your pediatrician or your school’s counselor to help in contacting and providing names of recommended counselors and psychiatrists.
4. Treatment and curing centers – The counselor, therapist or psychiatrist that you may consult may feel that your teenager is too troubled and her behavior is too troubling to treat as an outpatient. In such a situation you will have to commit your teen in a treatment centre for a time period suggested by the doctors and consultants in the centre.
5. Communicate – Communicating with your child may be very difficult at this phase of their life, you need to make an intensive and determined effort to keep the lines of communication open as much as possible. This will help them to converse without hesitation. You should encourage more time to be spending with family. Go out with them. Give them your time. Show that you care. Show them that you are there beside them to love and support them. Encourage them to invite their friends for lunch or dinner. Search for new hobbies that you and your child can enjoy together.
Professional help and good communication can help your teen in this phase of life. Being a parent, you need to understand your child and give them all the love, care and support.
Sex Education
Jan 28th
Sex education is broad term that encompasses a wide range of topics that relate to human sexual anatomy, sexual intercourse, sexual reproduction, reproductive health, reproductive rights, contraception, and other facets of human sexual behavior. Sex education can be a part of school programs but it can also be informally taught by parents or guardians or through various public health campaigns.
Sex education may also pertain to ‘sexuality education,’ which means that it also covers all perspectives about human sexuality. As such, it would integrate discussions about reproduction, family planning, and all the elements of one’s sexuality. Human sexuality in itself is a scopic term which takes into account body image; sexual orientation; morals and values; communication and decision making; dating and relationships. Also included are more sensitive topics such as sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and birth control methods.
As aforementioned sex education can be taught informally, such as discussing the matter with parents or friends. It can also be imparted by religious leaders, advocate groups, government campaigns or through mass media. The subject can also be effectively delivered through sex self-help authors, newspaper and magazine articles, or through a number of sex education websites.
Sex education from the onset of its conception to date has remained a sensitive and controversial issue in several nations. There are schools that incorporate sex education as a full course as part of the curriculum, particularly in junior high school or high school. In other instances, it just forms part of a broader topic such as biology, health and fitness or physical education. There are schools with no sex education in their curriculum, since there has been much debate as to the age at which students ought to be exposed to such sensitive topics, the amount of information that should be taught, and topics dealing with human sexual behavior.
Whenever sex education is subjected to debates, the primary argument is whether discussing sexuality is beneficial or detrimental among teenagers. Among the points of contention are the use of birth control, teenage pregnancy, abortion and the transmission of diseases. It has been revealed that countries with conservative outlook towards sex education tend to have a higher incidence of teenage pregnancy and STIs.
Other pressing issues have come to the fore and have fueled a new sense of urgency to the topic of sex education. Perhaps the most glaring example is the unprecedented spread of the AIDS virus. In Africa for instance, where AIDS has reached pandemic proportions, sex education is viewed by experts as a key component in developing an effective public health strategy.
The Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States (SIECUS) reported that 93% of adults who took part in their survey professed support for sex education in high school and 84% expressed support to have sex education introduced in junior high school. Moreover, 88% of parents of junior high school students and 80% of parents of high school students believe that formal sex education would make it easier for them to candidly talk to their teenagers about sex.
How to Handle Teen Behavior Problems
High School and it’s Variables
Jan 27th
It is amazing how fast things can change; how pure innocence can turn to arrogance and adventuresome. It seems up until your first year in high school, you feel safe from anything. You are preoccupied with life as how you knew it from the start, when in school you’re intrigued to hear rumors in junior high, they’re usually about who likes who, and who broke up with who. It just seems so naive. But when you stepped into high school, it becomes an entirely different ballgame. Somehow you seem to have been stripped of all your innocence. Suddenly you become vulnerable to the evils that you knew nothing about before. It seems the only thing people talk about is either sex or drug use. We all know of so many personalities who have so much potential to do great things in life, but threw it all away when they started to use drugs.
This is the daunting scenario that we have today. We are aware of it, the government is aware of it, law enforcers are aware of it but still the nagging problem persists and threatens the fragile future of our youth today. Numbers don’t lie. Nearly half of all high school seniors in America have experimented with illegal drugs and about three quarters have tried alcohol. A study conducted on the drug use prevalence among high school seniors in the US revealed the following: 41.8% have tried marijuana and at least 5% uses it everyday; 7.8% have used cocaine; 1.5% have tried heroin; 72.2% have used alcohol and 3.1% take alcohol daily; 6.5% have tried ecstasy; 8.4% have tried using hallucinogens (LSD, Magic Mushrooms, Peyote); and at least 15.4% have reported having used prescription drugs (Vicodin, OxyContin etc.) to get high. These are alarming statistics but equally disturbing is how easily high school students can get hold of these prohibited drugs. The dilemma that we have today is worse than what our parents had to deal with; and at the rate things are going it is quite likely that by the time you have kids, the situation will be ten times worse than what it is today.
The problem should be addressed now with more stringent measures and from different fronts. It should be a collective and conscious effort from the government, school administrations and more importantly the parents. Parents should be educated about the dangers facing their teens today because they are for real and are likely to stay if nothing is done to stem the problem. The government should make laws with much more teeth in them so as to deter drug dealers and manufacturers who are selling these substances like pancakes. Schools must have more effective screening and monitoring systems to keep drugs away from their vicinity and thus give their students a good shot for a productive college life. Illicit drugs seem to fall in and out of favor with experimental youths. But one thing is constant, more and more teens are experimenting with it. The perils are great and more threatening than ever, but studies consistently show that teens whose parents talk to them about drugs are at a much lower risk to experiment.
Talk to Your Children
Jan 27th
If we can only get rid of memories of traumatic events maybe it can diminish distress especially among our children and young adults. Such is not the case because we are not programmed to do so. Remembering what transpired on 9/11 can be a lot more difficult and painful especially among those who lost a loved one or for those who were directly impacted by that tragic day when terrorists struck fear and anxiety into the hearts of people from all corners of the globe. Moreover, media coverage commemorating the events in a detailed manner may heighten distress or indifference among our children.
So the question is, how can parents explain something so gruesome and traumatic to their children? Parents can’t shield their children from acquiring information about what is so significant about 9/11. It is a thing of the past but it definitely left an indelible mark in history and on the eight anniversary of the attacks on the World Trade Center, as publication of news and photos of that tragic day find their way to our newspapers, television screens and the Internet, parents are dumbfounded about the manner on how they can explain to their children this hard and complex subject.
There are certain tips which may help all concerned parents on this particular issue. The first thing to do is to try to relax while discussing the topic. You have to consider the fact that talking about violent acts won’t increase your children’s fear any more than harbor anxiety about the unknown. Try to determine and feel what your child already knows about the event so you can somehow gauge the impact of the information you want to discuss thereby establishing the parameters of the subsequent conversation.
Try to be as transparent and honest as possible although you can opt to refrain from providing detailed information. Children are generally smart, they can sense when they are being lied to or when you’re withdrawing something from them. It’s not appropriate to eliminate your children’s fear but a thorough explanation should be given to assure them somehow that there is nothing to be afraid of as government authorities are trying to find ways to protect the nation’s citizenry against another horrible event. Just make sure that your children are interested about the flow of the conversation, otherwise it’s better to drop the topic. Your children may not yet want or need to discuss the event at this particular period but they will certainly bring it out sooner or later.
Parents ought to be very careful when discussing traumatic events to their children and young adults especially those with acts of terrorism such as 9/11 because you are not certain how they will interpret and react on such sensitive subject matters.
Graduate From College?
Jan 27th
A recent research discovered distressing signs that demographic factors such as gender, race, and parental education play significant roles in ascertaining a student’s fate, no matter how studious or hardworking the particular student may be. Those from families with below-average earnings or whose parents didn’t finish college, are the ones failing college at disproportionate rates, even when distinguished from students with similar grades and test scores. Well to do undergrads earn 11 percent more degrees from flagship universities than comparable students from the poorest income quartile. White men are six percent more likely to graduate than black men with similar grades and scores. Women earn degrees at much higher rates than men. The findings about the actions that parents, students, and politicians should and shouldn’t take to fix the problems are already creating controversy.
High school grades are among the best indicators of how well a student will do in college. They typically manifest qualities of motivation and perseverance, good study habits and time management skills that tell us about their chances of completing a college program. Students who attend wealthier high schools do seem to enjoy a slight edge in enrolling in college and elite high schools appear to help the very best students succeed at the most selective public universities.
Students shouldn’t settle for less in a college. They have a better chance of graduating if they go to school with other students as talented as they are. High school grades are extremely important as indicators of success in college. It will not do for high school students to believe that ‘just getting through’ is enough, students have to work, they have to achieve. If they do, they have a better chance of succeeding in college and later in life.
Research has shown the influence of inspired and determined peers, who are not always present in community college classrooms. Many community college students also have expressed concerns over the years about the inability of their schools to direct them to classes that will count as transfer credits. In addition, many students are certainly put off by complexities in transfer processes.
Cash is another factor, it absolutely helps but is not a cure-all. More generous scholarships, or lower net tuition fees, can raise graduation rates by 5 to 10 percent. In addition, putting together enough aid with extra support services for students and parents does even more to guide and assist students through to graduation.
There is some hope though. The graduation rate success of students involved in experiments shows that graduation rates can be increased substantially if enough resources and creativity are put to work.
Murder of Own Father
Jan 27th
Just recently, CNN reported a heart-breaking news about a Berkeley teen who was convicted in the murder of his father. The victim was raising three kids on his own when one of them, for reasons unknown, murdered him with a gunshot to the head. The judge handling the case found the 16-year-old teen guilty of first-degree murder with an enhancement for using a gun in the death of his 40-year-old father.
When the teen was sentenced, the judge could have him locked up in the California Division of Juvenile Justice until he reaches the age of 25. He could also face a variety of other sentences, including being placed on probation and sent home, being sent to a group home or placed in minimum security reform centers. Regardless of what happens, a life was lost and the life of the teenager and those of his siblings are put in jeopardy with the uneventful passing of their father who is supposed to guide them in today’s chaotic environment.
Teen violence is increasingly becoming one of the most serious problems of modern society. It is a curse not only for the victim but for his/her family and the entire society as well. It is also responsible for thousands of deaths every year around the world. This kind of violence alienates the victim from his/her family, friends and loved ones. Teenagers who engage in violence, generally try to keep themselves away from everyone. Psychologists explain that they do so for the sake of getting away from social embarrassment. Teen abuse lawyers advocate that the victim must get proper legal support at such delicate phase of her/his life.
Young adults are complicated, inquisitive, and filled with potential. Once left unchecked, they can blow up in a million pieces, causing problems resulting to irreparable damage or even death. This is precisely the reason why parents are endowed with the moral obligation to guide their teens during this crucial stage in their lives.
Oftentimes teenagers find their peer groups to be more significant to them than their parents. This being the case, it is as if parents are handling over the life of their teen to the type of group he/she may belong to. With this change come different expectations. This is why friends are such a key developmental and influential factor in the teenage years. Many teens who get involved in gangs are simply trying to live out their new group’s expectations rather than their parents’. Adolescents are all on an equal plane when it comes to violent behavior. Regardless of background, almost all adolescents become significantly more violent after puberty and it drops off again somewhere in their mid-20s.
The Teen’s Brain
Jan 27th
Today’s teenagers have been stereotyped as adventurous and harebrained individuals. They are generally fond of experimenting with things until they get in touch with drugs, sex, guns, alcohol among others. According to the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention figures, 16,000 young adults die each year from unintentional injuries and accidents. The most common justification for teenagers’ care-free attitude is that their brains just aren’t developed enough to know better. However, recent research shows that in some cases the fact is just the opposite, the brain matures not too slowly but perhaps, too quickly.
According to a psychiatrist, an adolescent who engages in more dangerous activities have white-matter pathways that seem to be more mature than those of risk-averse youths. White-matter is the brain’s wiring, the neutral pathways that connect the various gray-matter regions of the cerebrum that are independent of one another. Having a mature white-matter is necessary because it allows faster brain processing speed. Nerve impulses also travel faster in mature white-matter. Experiments also reveal that the more mature the look of the brain, the more adventurous the teenager tended to be.
Another possible explanation is that some teenagers whose brains develop more rapidly than others become uncomfortable and a little confused owing to the gap between their biological capabilities and the social norms they must follow as kids. Precocious development of these neural tracts may make some adolescents more susceptible to engage in behaviors that society considers too adult in nature for their chronological age. It is also a common notion that teens make dumb decisions because their brains are immature. In other words, having a more mature brain may actually motivate some teens to try out new and potentially harmful experiences.
For now, these theories are mere speculation, and the researchers concede that the interaction of white and gray matter is so complex that hard conclusions remain elusive. The results of the study are relatively bare and by no means conclusive. The human brain is so intricate in nature, and one has to consider the fact that there are other factors that come into play such as the environment and certain genetic predispositions that are equally complex to study.
Trends and Changes for Teens
Jan 26th
Over the past few decades there has been a drastic change in sexual behavior among teenagers. It is quite glaring that teen females have gradually become more liberated and sexually aggressive, to the point of being promiscuous. There is absolutely an upheaval in the sexual context of what is socially acceptable and what is not. Teenage behavior has changed dramatically and it appears to veer toward homosexual behaviors. There seems to be more awareness of sex-linked diseases and teenage pregnancy has generally become more acceptable.
Whatever norms that society has set in the past seem to have gone out the window. Some teens create their own norms based on what they “feel” instead of what is socially acceptable as appropriate behavior. Sadly, some teens have the notion that if something feels good, then it should be okay. No one can argue that sex is going to feel good. It should feel good because it was designed that way, but it doesn’t mean that it is appropriate all the time.
Sex ought to be something quite intimate – almost sacred, but it has become an art among today’s teenagers. Teens have found ways to engage in sex without inducing pregnancy. Sex itself has become a multi-million dollar industry. People know that sex sells, especially among teens. Go to the mall and you’ll see public displays of sexuality in some of the windows of shops. Go online and it’s basically the same scenario. You may even hear negative comments from teens about such stores yet they still have a strong desire to shop in such stores. Sex now has a price tag and is currently marketed as being fulfilling and romantic. It is apparently safe and easy and one can simply walk away with no strings attached.
Such a radical shift in the concept of sex among teenagers has been largely influenced by media, by peers, and by the culture and locations in which they live. There are three reasons why teens engage in sex as some form of recreation. These include irresponsible parents, puberty and desire, and the need for love. As soon as the word love comes into the picture, the green light for having sex greatly increases. If a boy professes love for a girl, then she becomes more likely to succumb to sexual pressure than if he doesn’t.
Parents need to constantly show their love to their teens because if the need for love is being met, they won’t have to look for it in the arms of another teen. Parents need to explain the emotional impact and the repercussions that come along with giving one’s sexuality to another. They need to help teenagers look past the fleeting pleasure derived from sex. Teens should learn to set lifetime goals for the future and consider whether having a child would fit into those goals. By having a clear set of goals for the future, teens won’t be easily swept by a sudden surge of emotions and they would be smart enough to gauge whether having a child is worth the risk of engaging into a momentary act of passion. Finally, parents must impart the value of self-control. Talk to your teen, explain to them how modern society is portraying sexuality and personal convictions. Keep them informed so they won’t be tempted to try something that they would regret later on.