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Parenting Books
Jul 20th
I have read a number of books on parenting written by psychologists and PhDs who say that they have solutions for all the problems. None of them were impressive or helped me to be a better parent. White Oleander a book about fiction had a great effect on me and my life. This book is just a great fiction, not at all a parenting book, and it has influenced me tremendously and made a great impact on my way of thinking. It helped me to put myself into my daughter’s shoes and understand how important it is for them to get their parent’s attention, support and most significant their mother’s love.
The book, White Oleander, is a story regarding a girl named Astrid whose mother is imprisoned for murder. Astrid goes through a serious of foster homes and five foster mothers. Each of her “mothers” has a different personality and attitude to life, and it is amazing and completely convincing how Astrid changes with every mother – her behavior, her beliefs, her clothes, her ambitions, her self- confidence and self-worth. In one house she becomes a devout catholic, in another she smokes pot and contemplates suicide. In a matter of weeks, with a new very loving “mother”, Astrid become a good student, takes professional art classes, goes to museums and plans on going to college. Her view of herself goes through gradual but dramatic transformations depending on how her “mother” sees her.
Her real mother is a constant shadow in Astrid’s life. They used to send letters to each other, and this way Astrid wanted to get her mother’s support. When she fails to get the approval she craves so much, she does not want it anymore; she just wants to get a shock, a reaction. Even though Astrid’s mother claims she loves her daughter, Astrid is not convinced and she is searching for that proof until she is an adult.
A number of people are just too selfish to get married; regrettably several mothers are also too selfish to have kids. For such parents their own interests are more important as compared to their children’s. Several people, especially mothers, like to have another person under their control who can be dominated and manipulated emotionally. That was the case of Astrid’s real mother. It is interesting to see how Astrid struggles to accept the fact that even though she loves her mother, she does not like her, and does not agree with the choices her mother made in her life. It takes a lot of soul-searching and maturity for her to realize that she is not her mother, and she does not have to repeat her mother’s mistakes.
This book is a very important read for all parents, especially mothers, for all children, who have by now become parents themselves. It helped me to understand about my connection with my mother and all my experiences of emotions and feeling. It also helped me to be clearly aware of how my young daughters depend on my words, reactions and behavior, and how desperately all of us including adults and children need mother’s love.
At BooksOnParenting.net, you will learn all about parenting books, parent book, and best parenting book
Parenting Books
Apr 27th
I have read a number of books on parenting written by psychologists and PhDs who say that they have solutions for all the problems. None of them were impressive or helped me to be a better parent. White Oleander a book about fiction had a great effect on me and my life. This book is just a great fiction, not at all a parenting book, and it has influenced me tremendously and made a great impact on my way of thinking. It helped me to put myself into my daughter’s shoes and understand how important it is for them to get their parent’s attention, support and most significant their mother’s love.
The book, White Oleander, is a story regarding a girl named Astrid whose mother is imprisoned for murder. Astrid goes through a serious of foster homes and five foster mothers. Each of her “mothers” has a different personality and attitude to life, and it is amazing and completely convincing how Astrid changes with every mother – her behavior, her beliefs, her clothes, her ambitions, her self- confidence and self-worth. In one house she becomes a devout catholic, in another she smokes pot and contemplates suicide. In a matter of weeks, with a new very loving “mother”, Astrid become a good student, takes professional art classes, goes to museums and plans on going to college. Her view of herself goes through gradual but dramatic transformations depending on how her “mother” sees her.
Her real mother is a constant shadow in Astrid’s life. They used to send letters to each other, and this way Astrid wanted to get her mother’s support. When she fails to get the approval she craves so much, she does not want it anymore; she just wants to get a shock, a reaction. Even though Astrid’s mother claims she loves her daughter, Astrid is not convinced and she is searching for that proof until she is an adult.
A number of people are just too selfish to get married; regrettably several mothers are also too selfish to have kids. For such parents their own interests are more important as compared to their children’s. Several people, especially mothers, like to have another person under their control who can be dominated and manipulated emotionally. That was the case of Astrid’s real mother. It is interesting to see how Astrid struggles to accept the fact that even though she loves her mother, she does not like her, and does not agree with the choices her mother made in her life. It takes a lot of soul-searching and maturity for her to realize that she is not her mother, and she does not have to repeat her mother’s mistakes.
This book is a very important read for all parents, especially mothers, for all children, who have by now become parents themselves. It helped me to understand about my connection with my mother and all my experiences of emotions and feeling. It also helped me to be clearly aware of how my young daughters depend on my words, reactions and behavior, and how desperately all of us including adults and children need mother’s love.
At BooksOnParenting.net, you will learn all about parenting books, parent book, and best parenting book
Consumer Action and Advice
Mar 23rd
Every one of us either needs some kind of help or has some help to offer. Whichever group you belong there are ways to receive help and offer help. Whatever your goal is for offering help you may find out more on internet and sites as “points of light” and “do something”. Every one of us can contribute in some way and if you don’t know in which way you may contribute you can easily ask around or look up on internet for any kind of talents you have that may benefit someone.
Now there are many reasons for any one of us to volunteer and do some community service. We all know that the planet is getting polluted every day, there are also many people with disabilities that need us and many people without shelter that just need a warm meal. You can pick any of those and find a way in which you may help somebody.
The way in which you can help others may vary on your abilities but it may also be a way for you to experience something new, a new friendship, and a future job experience, something that may lead you to the right direction in choosing your future carrier. Just think about it, there are many people in need of help and if you can give them that help you will make a big difference. And it will not be as small as you may think, like what can one man change? You can change a lot, and if every person contributed just a small amount you can just imagine the power of that change, the power of that contribution to the whole world. The idea is joining hands to help the people in need.
The exactly same thing goes for every person in need of help or guidance. You can find any information’s necessary using search engines, asking at your school or calling organizations that may offer public services. You can also find that information’s in your local newspaper, radio and television. When you find many of those organizations you can find exactly in which way you may contribute or how can you enroll in a program that will offer you help, or guidance in choosing the right carrier. The options are many, and you need to find the right one for you, whichever that may be. Over 90% of the US student body feels that it is important to be a part of a voluntary community service. That statistic means something, and it may point you in the right direction.
Whatever the reason you may have, it is important to try and help people around you that can use the help. The best way to find out about organizations that help people is by browsing internet and using search engines like Google. You can start from here, this will give you an insight into what you may do to contribute. And if you choose to help, you will know where to start and how to start.
Young Entrepreneurs
Mar 18th
Have you ever thought of running your own business? If you have you probably didn’t think it possible until you finish school or college. Well you don’t need to finish school to start your own business, nor do you need to finish college. You can have a part time business that you can manage in your own free time, and that will give you the greatest experience that you can use along with college education to make real profits in the future.
You want to start your own business and become a young entrepreneur, well there are a few things to know before you get started. First you need an idea for your new business, and you can get an idea from your life, from your friends, previous experiences or some good old fashioned research using Internet or library. When narrowing down your ideas think about the things that may benefit you, like what do you like to do, do you have any technical skills and how much time do you need for a successful business. Once you figure out what you want to do you need to do some research. Find out if there is a need for the service you will provide, what is your competition and is your product better, make sure you think through every aspect of your business.
All that leads to creating a good business plan which every company needs in order to succeed. But the most important part of business plan is financing, and that is not so easy to come by. First thing you need to do is put everything in writing, do a research on how much that business of yours will cost to get you started. Once you get a number you can consider a way of funding your business. You may be able to pull it off from your own money, or maybe loan from your family or friends. And if that is not an option you can always go to the bank and ask for a loan. But when asking for loans there are several things to keep in mind. Think business; get only the amount you need with the fastest repay time, in order to avoid high interest. And of course that leaves you with knowing the law and legal parts of owning a business. That may be the hardest part, as you need to keep your books in order, pay taxes and keep everything under control. But there is also a way to do that easily, everything can be done easily with a good preparation. You just need to inform yourself.
Once you take care of all that you are a new businessman, a young entrepreneur. For any information’s necessary and some guidance you can check online government sites that help and inform new entrepreneurs of all things needed to start and maintain their new business. Also you can find a lot of useful tips and ideas for starting your new business, all you need is a good will and some little bit of time.
Parents’ Responsibility in Sex Education
Mar 6th
With the drastic changes in modern society, teenagers are becoming sexually active at earlier ages. What young people ought to know about sex should start with their parents. They must be the first source of sex education for their teens. A lot of parents are confused, if not afraid, about what they should impart to their teens when it comes to the topic of sex. They are also often worried that sexual information could trigger or increase their teen’s interest in experimentation. However, several studies have revealed that sex education do not encourage or heighten sexual activity. In fact, well informed teenagers make better decisions about their sexuality when they have the notion that no subjects are regarded as taboo at home.
Sex is a topic that should not be taken lightly. Teenagers are prone to suffer lots of consequences if they are unaware of the essential aspects that they should know about sex. Some parents tend to wait for their teens to approach them and ask about the matter. But if it does not happen, they tend to be anxious when their teens never ask questions that are sexual in nature. Parents must realize that teenagers pick up cues and have perhaps realized that topics related to sex make them jittery and uncomfortable. As a result, teens just try to steer away from the topic and this is often the root of the problem. Who’s better to explain the morality and repercussions of sex to teenagers than their parents? They are gravely mistaken if they believe that they no longer have the responsibility to teach their teens about sex and sexuality simply because human sexuality can be learned in school. Parents must realize that in most cases, schools only teach about the anatomy and physiology of human sexuality. It usually ends there that’s why morality and issues related to sex remain proscribed. This is precisely the reason why parents should take an active role and teach their teens about their moral obligations when it comes to sex, including their moral obligations toward their partner.
This is of particular importance if teenagers are already sexually active. Parents must take on the responsibility of opening their eyes about the possible repercussions of their actions. Teenagers must have a clear awareness and understanding about the implications of their sexual behavior. There are really a lot of issues to impart to teens about sex to help them protect themselves from easily falling prey to its hazards. Parents must be a part of their teen’s lives and make them feel good about their sexuality from the onset. This way, it would be easier for teens to take time out and sit down with their parents and talk about the matter in a manner that is stress-free and without hesitations or restrictions. Altogether, sex education is definitely a difficult topic to discuss with teenagers but parents must realize that it is just another crucial responsibility that they can’t escape from.
| Adolescent Therapy |
Teen Dating Violence
Mar 2nd
Dating violence has been defined by the United Sates Department of Justice as “the perpetration or threat of an act of violence by at least one member of an unmarried couple on the other member within the context of dating or courtship.” Dating among teenagers from its cover appears like a totally distinct realm where violence ceases to exist. However, statistics show that one in every five teens has experienced violence from their dating partners.
Violence in teen dating typically starts with the teenager trying to maintain power and control over the other teenager through some form of abuse. In order to seize control of their partner, a teenager may turn to physical violence, harassment, calling names, sexual abuse etc. Teen dating violence decussates all socio-economic and racial lines; with majority of the victims being young women who are likewise at higher risk for sustaining serious injury.
Most teenagers who are faced with this problem are cognizant of their situation yet choose to stay in the abusive relationship. One reason is because teenagers are typically inexperienced with dating relationships. Some perceive it as a status symbol which is often the consequence of pressure from peers to engage in dating relationships. Another reason is that some teenagers get a false sense of security from the relationship.
Based on recent statistics, about 35% of teenage girls will experience teen dating violence. There are two sides to this problem: one is on the side of young women and the other on the side of young men. Young women may believe that they bear the responsibility of solving the problems in their relationship. Others think that they can modify the behavior or “cure” their boyfriend. Some may even feel that there is no one to ask for help. On the other hand, young men may believe that they possess their partners and have the right to control them in any way they wish. Others may think that masculinity entails physical aggressiveness; or they may lose respect from their male friends once they are affectionate and supportive toward their girlfriends.
Without proper guidance and education, teenagers often fall prey to drugs, sex and other abuses. During this tumultuous stage in their lives, teenagers fail to understand what is happening and being young they don’t know how to react to it. By the time they realize their predicament, it is either too late or they are left devastated physically and emotionally. Teen dating violence can have lasting effects in the life of the victim and can persist through adulthood. In order to avoid all these problems, teenagers must understand that they have options; that they can choose better relationships and believe they are valuable individuals who deserve to be treated with dignity and respect.
Precocious Puberty
Mar 1st
Precocious puberty, also called pubertas praecox, refers to the unusually early onset of puberty or the appearance of physical and hormonal signs of pubertal development at an earlier age than is considered normal. Precocious puberty may be a deviation from normal development, or may be caused by a disease or abnormal hormone exposure.
There are two types of precocious puberty; the first is called idiopathic central precocious puberty which is natural in every aspect except for age. Central precocious puberty can develop if there is abnormality or damage in the inhibitory system of the brain, or a hypothalamic hamartoma produces pulsatile gonadotropin-releasing hormone (GnRH). The other type is termed peripheral precocious puberty or precocious pseudopuberty which is characterized by secondary development triggered by sex steroids from other aberrant sources such as congenital adrenal hyperplasia, gonadal tumors, etc.
The possible causes of precocious puberty in some children can be better understood by, knowing what exactly causes puberty to start. It involves a complex process referred to as the hypothalamic-pituitary-gonadal axis (HPG axis) which takes over once puberty occurs. The process involves a series of steps: the brain’s hypothalamus produces gonadotropin-releasing hormone (Gn-RH) which triggers the pituitary gland to release luteinizing harmone (LH) and follicle-stimulating harmone (FSH). LH and FSH in turn stimulate the ovaries to produce estrogen which is responsible for the growth and development of female sexual characteristics and the testes to produce testosterone which is responsible for the growth and development of male sexual characteristics. The production of estrogen and testosterone causes the physical changes of puberty.
What causes the process to commence early in some children depends on the type of precocious puberty they have. In central precocious puberty, the HPG axis starts prematurely. Even though the process begins earlier than it should, the sequence and timing of the steps are otherwise normal. In most children with this condition, there is no underlying medical condition and no specific reason for the HPG axis to take its course. On the other hand, peripheral precocious puberty occurs independent of the Gn-RH. The cause is the release of estrogen or testosterone into the body due to problems or abnormalities with the ovaries, testes, adrenal glands or the pituitary gland.
The symptoms of precocious puberty vary; in females menstruation may appear before age 10 and the breasts may begin to develop before age eight. In males, the typical age of onset is before age 10; they may start to develop facial, underarm, and pubic hair; the voice deepens; growth accelerates; and behavior tends to be more aggressive. Those with precocious puberty may grow quickly at first and be taller than their peers. However, because their bones mature faster than normal, they usually stop growing earlier than usual. As a result, the affected individual is short in stature by the time he/she reaches adulthood.
It is important to note that there is no reliable age limit which delineates normal from abnormal developments in children nowadays; however, there are certain age thresholds that can be used for evaluation to detect a potential medical problem. The following are tell tale signs: breast development in girls before age seven or the appearance of pubic hair before age eight; start of menstruation before age 10; growth of pubic hair or genital enlargement in boys before age nine; breast development in boys prior to the appearance of pubic hair and testicular enlargement. For definitive diagnosis, a combination of clinical exam, blood tests for levels of hormones, CT scan or MRI of the brain, and bone X-rays can be done.
The treatment for precocious puberty depends on the cause. Most patients with central precocious puberty with no underlying medical condition can be effectively treated with medication. The treatment is called Gn-RH analogue therapy, which normally incorporates a monthly injection of a medication which blocks the hypothalamic-pituitary-gonadal (HPG) axis thereby delaying further development. The patient continues to receive the medication until he or she reaches the normal age of puberty. Another viable treatment is with the drug anastrozole. A GnRH-specific drug Histrelin acetate, may also be used. In case another medical condition is causing the child’s precocious puberty, treating the other condition is imperative in order to stop the progress of puberty.
Delayed Puberty
Feb 28th
Puberty is said to be delayed when a girl or a boy has gone through the usual age of onset of puberty without any physical or hormonal signs that it is beginning. The typical signs of puberty normally appear by age 13 for girls and age 14 for boys. However, puberty may be delayed for a number of years yet progress normally, such a case is regarded as constitutional delay and is a modification of healthy physical development.
Delayed puberty can be hereditary, meaning the late onset of puberty may run in the family. It may also occur due to undernutrition, genetic disorders, several forms of systemic and chronic diseases, pituitary defects and diseases (e.g. hypopituitarism), hypothalamic defects and diseases (e.g. Prader-Willi Syndrome Kallmann Syndrome), gonadal defects and diseases (e.g. Turner Syndrome, Klinefelter syndrome) various forms of congenital adrenal hyperplasia, and other hormone deficiencies and imbalances.
A lack of symptoms of puberty is the main indicator that a child may be suffering from delayed puberty. Below are the most common symptoms of delayed puberty. However, it is important to note that symptoms vary among affected children. Symptoms may include:
· girls:
o no breast development by age 13
o over five years between breast development and menstrual period
o no menarche by age 16
o lack of pubic hair by age 14
· boys:
o no testicular enlargement by age 14
o lack of pubic hair by age 15
o over five years to complete genital enlargement
Delayed puberty can be accurately diagnosed by pediatric endocrinologists since they are the physicians with an extensive training and experience in evaluating the disorder. He/she may conduct a thorough physical examination as well as a complete review of the patient’s medical history and growth pattern.
Blood tests may also be ordered, particularly for the gonadotropins, because high levels immediately confirm gonadal defects or deficiency of the sex steroids. In most cases, screening tests such as a complete blood count, general chemistry screens, thyroid tests, and urinalysis may also be valuable to check for chromosomal abnormalities, diabetes, anemia, and other conditions that may delay puberty.
A bone x-ray of the wrist or hand may also be performed to determine whether the child has reached a stage of physical maturation at which puberty should be underway. Notable secondary sexual development typically starts when girls reach a bone age of 10.5 to 11 years, and boys reach a bone age of 11.5 to 12 years. Other more sophisticated and more expensive tests such as computed tomography scan or magnetic resonance imaging may be done when specific evidence suggests they may be useful.
The treatment for delayed puberty will be determined by the physician based on the following factors:
· the child’s age, medical history and overall health
· the child’s tolerance for certain medications, procedures or therapeutic approach
· extent and expectations for the course of the condition
· the parents’ opinion or preference
If the patient is healthy but simply late, no intervention is usually required. But in more pronounced cases of delay, a low dose of estrogen or testosterone for a few months may induce puberty to proceed normally. If the delay is caused by a disease, then the medical intervention is likely to focus on treating the disease. Often, when the underlying illness is treated, puberty proceeds normally. In case it becomes evident that there is a permanent defect of the reproductive system, therapeutic intervention usually involves hormone replacement or hormone therapy to stimulate the development of secondary sexual characteristics.
Tips on handling a wayward child
Feb 26th
Parenting an adolescent is not simple. It takes creativity, willpower and tolerance! It is a difficult journey. While there is no magic spells that will make teens behave in a different manner, you can accomplish the similar extreme transformation by learning how to tackle your child and approach your adolescent in order to get the outcome you desire.
Here are some parenting tips:
1. Accept the adolescent the way they are: Accept your child and his/her rebelliousness, and prepare yourself to tolerate that reality. If the child is disobedient and defiant, it doesn’t mean you also have to behave in a similar manner. Move on with your life, be happy and keep a belief that in all likelihood, everything will be fine in few years time. It’s not going to be easy. As parents want to improve the child as soon as possible. Be enduring and positive. Just bear in mind that the majority of children who go off the profound end as teenagers eventually re-emerge as responsible, mature adults.
2. When the adolescent is off track, you need to take extra pain and effort to secure and support the bonds of affection and apprehension connecting you and your child. Parents must stop getting disappointed. They should stop lecturing the child all the time, stop fuming, grieving, being mournful and start giving. Parents should show their love and care through gestures. Hug your child, tell him/her of your love and show that you care. Smile at them, laugh with them even though you are crying from within or are angry. It is necessary to put up an act. However, the act should be a sincere one. All children love being loved and want loving parents. Your child may disappoint you, but being parents and mature you should always be there for them and never disappoint them.
3. Never protect your teenagers from the responsibility and penalty of their actions and deeds. Consequences are the supreme teachers in our lives. When we protect our teenagers against the consequences of their actions and deeds, we alter reality and hinder their healthy growth and development. Hence the child will never learn how to tackle the consequences of his own actions.
Support the institutions of Society that scatter penalty. If your child attains a speeding ticket, the police are not to be blamed. If the child is caught shoplifting, the company security is not to be blamed. If he is caught in possession of tobacco, drugs or alcohol and is sent to the juvenile court, the justice system or the court is not to be blamed. Getting caught is possibly the greatest thing that can happen to children who take on illegal actions.
How To Get Student Aid From the FAFSA
Feb 24th
Free Application for Federal Student Aid, more commonly referred to as FAFSA, is a form that any anticipating undergraduate or graduate student in the United States in need of educational funding can fill to evaluate whether they are eligible for government funding. It is regulated by the US Department of Education and is distributed by the Federal Direct Student Loan Program.
Questions on the FAFSA form evaluate a student’s financial status and needs, as well as the financial needs of the family. No question addresses matters of race, religion, sexual orientation, disability or ethnicity, showing that applications for the FAFSA are not discriminatory in any way.
An applicant is eligible for Federal Student Aid if they meet a certain criteria. The person should be a US citizen, national or eligible non-citizen, and have a valid Social Security number. A high school diploma or GED, or a pass in an Ability-ti-Benefit test for adult students is also required. For male students aged between 18 and 25, the applicant should be registered with the US Selective Service, meaning that they can be called to military service.
Other qualifications include that the applicant should not owe any refunds to any student grants, should not be convicted of drug possession or sale, and should promise to use the federal aid for education purposes only.
Applying for federal aid through FAFSA occurs in three steps. The first is to prepare all the documents necessary for the application; the second step is to fill out the FAFSA itself; the last step is to await the results of the application.
The documents required for the application include the applicant’s driver’s license if there is one, records of the applicant’s income such as the W-1 forms, current bank statements. Dependent students should get their parents’ federal tax returns records, while non-dependent students should get their own tax records and their spouse’s if they are married. Untaxed income records such as Veteran benefits, child support, and worker’s compensation should be included if applicable.
After gathering these documents, a FAFSA form is available online for the applicant to fill from FAFSA.ED.gov. The form will require the applicant to select the year of application and other details about financial conditions, the school that the applicant intends to study in as well as the course code of the degree they desire. The completed form is then submitted online, which ushers the student into the third step of the process: waiting for results.
Applicants are able to check the progress of their FAFSA applications online by using the PIN number given at the end of Step 2 to log in to the Fafsa.ed.gov website. The PIN can be used to correct any information on the FAFSA form especially updating financial records and other details. It is also used to access information from the Department of Education website. During the waiting process, the schools chosen in Step 2 automatically receive information that you have applied for funding due to the school and course codes. This makes it convenient for the school to receive the grants directly.
FAFSA applications go through rigorous examination by the relevant bodies, so all information included in the application should be truthful and accurate to guarantee success in receiving aid for university education.